Happy Birthday!

Paterson's birthday is December 31. I will forever be sorry to him for being unable to cross my legs for another week so that he didn't get such a sucky birth date. In years to come he may be grateful, but for the next 15 years or so he's not really going to be able to have a decent celebration. Every one is away, or going to NYE parties so he gets forgotten. Next year we're going to have a party for him on 31 November instead - everyone is still around and not so absorbed in Christmas. We did have a lovely night at a friend's place on NYE and had a cake for him so it wasn't so bad, but I do feel awful for not going the whole hog for him.

Anyhoo, whingeing aside, Paddy is turning 2. Hence the cake. I made that. I was pretty impressed, except that the marzipan duck in the marzipan pond is freakishly large compared to the vehicles on the road. Not Godzilla large. But half the size of a car large.

Paterson is obsessed with cars and airplanes and trains at the moment. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised - him being a boy and all - but its soooo stereotypically male. And Lily was the same with dolls I guess. She's always had a fair mix of 'boys' and 'girls' toys but gravitated toward the girls toys. We already noticed a difference in the way different gender kids play when we saw Lily and her cousin Marcus playing with dinosaurs. Marcus was making his dino's eat each other. Lily had hers in a school or a hospital or something. Same toy - different play.


Back to Paddy though; he's all man. Loves mechanical things, hitting things with a stick and jumping on the 'leen' while I sing 'get ready to wiggle'. Loves the Wiggles and Thomas. Loves his books. Loves emptying the pencil tin then sitting in it. He has an ever expanding vocabulary, but favourites include: No, Mine, ily (for Lily), Wiggool and 'leen'. He's the most precious little man and I'm blessed to have him for a son.

Merry whatever...

We had quite a lovely Christmas Day, despite having Old Nana taken to hospital with pneumonia and our family 'drunkle' (that's a drunken uncle) having a go at us for turning in at 10pm. So after a very non-christian-or-christmas outburst at my drunkle this morning * we departed to Nowra to have a second Christmas day with Nath's family. The kids had a lovely day - a quality present which delighted Lily and lots of cars for Paddy which kept him enthralled for hours. Lil also got an Astroboy toy from my sister which was a huge hit. Those of you who've been around for a while may remember Lil's desire for an Astroboy during the "Front" knitting incident last year. Its cause a few sharing issues but they've generally been delightful.

*After he bought my mother to tears I said to him 'Nice to know that it not just your own family's Christmas' that you f*** up, and that you don't mind f***ing ours up either'. I then dramatically closed the door and the curtains so he couldn't respond. Not very mature. And I'm not 100% proud of it. But I'm sick of letting people do/say awful things and get away with it. As the other resident drunk (currently on the wagon) I was the only one that could say it and get away with it.

Yarn bombing!

We were driving through O'Connor this evening and my ever vigilant husband spotted some yarn bombing! He immediately lept from the car (I slowed down slightly) so he could get a couple of snaps. It was at the roundabout at Scrivener and Brigalow Sts and at each of the four give way signs. Anyone know who's responsible? Kudos.

Pearl

Guess what Lily's getting for Christmas? Her very own Pearl Barley, made by the supremely talented Michelle at Poppy Bean and Bloss! I'm sooo jealous.

Black dogs and blerg....

Still yucky - but have prescription drugs now! Not much to say, given my day was primarily conducted from under the covers... except that I have the most wonderful husband who on his day off looked after the kids so I could recuperate and even took Lily with him to his Christmas lunch so I could sleep while Paddy was sleeping. You rock Nath. Night night folks.

Blogging the black dog from bed...

Not feeling crash hot tonight so I'm going to have an early one. Just in bed now, going to check a few blogs, the tune out with some meditations. Hopefully i will have kicked this sore throat by tomorrow. But I did have a good day none the less! Work Christmas lunch then the kids childcare Christmas party. Yet again Lily was too scared to go anywhere near Santa, and Paddy wsn't really down with the whole experience either. Anyhoo. I'll write more tomorrow.

Belting the black dog - day 3

Firstly I just wanted to thanks everyone who has commented or sent me good vibes in the last two days - I'm feeling the love! And thanks to the anonymous commenter who suggested a meditation - I got some by that bloke today and I think it will be enormously helpful.

When I went to my doctor on Monday to get some help she was really great and suggested that I might need a professional review of my medication and tried to get me in to a shrink. Using her influence she got me an appointment. In April 2010. Just as well I wasn't too close to the edge. Then I rang my psychologist. February 2010. Thankfully I got a cancellation appointment today which was exactly what i needed. She's wonderful. I'm pretty good at playing my depression down, and she called me on it. We talked through some stuff. Had a good laugh. And I left knowing that I had some tools to be able to belt the black dog with.

Then in the afternoon I took the kids to the Wiggles. It was my our first Wiggles experience and I loved it. These are individuals who must really love what they do and seem to have a really good time up there. Paddy was mesmerised - didn't dance or clap or sing - just stared. And Lil shouted and danced and sung and waved and had a great time. We did notice that Dorothy the Dinosaur and Wags the dog had apparently acquired eating disorders as their costumes looked very sleek in comparison to the old dvds we'd seen. But it was great.

And tonight we were out for my MILs birthday and one of those clubs that have children's play areas built in. Designed to keep kids entertained, but I always spend more time supervising other people's children in there so they're not injuring my kids.

And now I'm home. Kids are asleep. Husband is in bed and I'm keeping up a promise to myself to do something for me. Not a bad day at all! As Bec said today sometimes you need to reflect on the positives rather than the negatives of a day. Its working for me too Bec!

See youz tomorrow!

Blogging to beat the black dog - day 2

Last year I wrote this post about personal commandments to help me through the day. I notice that things haven't really changed since then... anyhoo. I thought I might revise those commandments.

1. Stop it!
2. Nothing will change, if I don’t do anything different
3. Meditate
4. I can do anything for five minutes
5. Get outside
6. Don't wait to 'feel like it'
   
7. CHOOSE to be positive
8. Be grateful

So I've lost a couple of commandments and got some different ones. I'll let you know next year how this one goes!

Catching up on some long-ago finished items too - here's a little t-shirt I made for my besties daughter a couple of months ago. I wasn't sure how it would stand up to washing, but it went well and was still going strong when we caught up in Adelaide last month.

Stop it!

So I've been a little low recently, and another lovely blogger brought to my attention the fact that it might have something to do with a lack of sharing. I've had a bit of a love-disklike relationship with blogging, but ultimately I think it provides me with a focus or a filter that I don't get with anything else. I can condense a day into a couple of lines. A shitty day at work is written down as 'tough day' and like that it becomes not a day of frustration or anger or defeated self-esteem but two little words. I just let it go - unconsciously. So on this steep, dark decline into depression, I've stopped blogging. And I think its made it worse. So I say 'stop the rot'. Or just 'stop it!' as the video says. I'm going to blog for 14 days straight people. Blogging to stop the rot. or Blog the black dog. or Beating the big black dog with a blogging stick. Any other naming ideas?

P.S I'm also going to try a guided meditation each day too - any suggestions?